Values-Based Career Decisions That Feel Right
Learn how to evaluate job opportunities and career paths based on what you actually value, not just the title or salary.
Read MoreFinding Your Core Values — A Practical Starting Point
A straightforward approach to identifying what actually matters to you, without overthinking. Includes a simple exercise you can finish in one sitting.
Why Most People Skip This Step
You’ve probably heard it before. “Know your values,” they say. “Live intentionally.” But here’s the thing — most people never actually sit down and figure out what their values are. They drift through decisions, say yes to things that don’t matter, and wonder why they feel unfulfilled.
The good news? This doesn’t have to be complicated. You don’t need a therapist, a self-help book, or a weekend retreat to discover what matters to you. What you need is clarity, and that’s something you can build in an afternoon.
The Three-Step Clarity Process
This approach works because it starts with what you already know about yourself.
01
Identify Your Moments
Think about times when you felt genuinely proud or satisfied. Not Instagram-proud, but actually content. Maybe you helped someone solve a problem, finished a difficult project, or had a real conversation with a friend. Write down 3-5 of these moments. What were you doing? Who were you with? What made it meaningful?
02
Extract the Themes
Look at those moments and ask: what was actually happening? Were you creating something? Supporting others? Learning? Taking action? Solving problems? You’ll start noticing patterns. Maybe helping people shows up in multiple moments. Maybe growth or creativity does. These patterns are pointing to your values.
03
Test Against Your Reality
Here’s the critical part. Take the values you’ve identified and ask: am I actually living these right now? If you value creativity but spend 40 hours a week doing repetitive work with no creative outlet, there’s a gap. That gap is often where frustration lives. Knowing this gap exists is the first step to closing it.
The 20-Minute Values Exercise
You don’t need special materials. Grab a pen and paper (or open a document). Set a timer for 20 minutes. No distractions — phone on silent.
Minutes 1-7: Write down 3-5 moments when you felt genuinely fulfilled. Don’t overthink it. Just write them down quickly.
Minutes 8-14: For each moment, write one sentence about why it mattered. What was the core of it?
Minutes 15-20: Look for patterns. Circle the words and themes that appear more than once. Those are your emerging values.
That’s it. You’ll walk away with 4-7 core values that actually mean something to you because they’re rooted in your own experience, not someone else’s ideal.
Common Values That Show Up (And What They Really Mean)
When people do this exercise, certain values appear repeatedly. Here’s what they usually point to:
Growth
You’re drawn to learning, improving, and becoming more capable. This shows up as taking on challenges, reading, trying new things, or developing skills. If this is your value, you’ll feel stuck in situations where you’re not progressing.
Connection
Relationships and community matter deeply. You’re fulfilled by meaningful conversations, helping others, and being part of something larger than yourself. Isolation or surface-level interactions drain you.
Autonomy
Freedom to make your own choices is non-negotiable. You need control over how you spend your time and energy. Micromanagement or rigid rules trigger real frustration.
Impact
Your work has to matter. Whether that’s helping individuals, solving problems, or creating something that lasts, you need to see the results of your effort. Busy work feels hollow.
Security
Stability and predictability help you feel grounded. You’d rather have consistent, reliable circumstances than constant excitement or uncertainty. This isn’t boring — it’s what allows you to focus on other things.
Creativity
You need outlets for self-expression and making something new. This shows up in art, writing, problem-solving, design, or any field where you’re creating something that didn’t exist before.
What Happens When You Know Your Values
Clarity creates momentum. Once you’ve identified what matters, decisions become easier. You’re not deciding based on what looks good or what others expect. You’re deciding based on what aligns with who you actually are.
Job offer? Ask: does this align with my values? New project? Check against your priorities. Social commitment? You can say no without guilt because you know what you’re protecting time for.
This doesn’t mean life becomes perfect. It means it becomes yours. And that makes a real difference.
A Note on Values Clarification
The exercise and framework in this article are educational tools designed to help you reflect on what matters to you personally. They’re based on common practices used in personal development and coaching. However, everyone’s situation is unique. If you’re working through complex decisions, facing significant life transitions, or struggling with questions about meaning and direction, talking with a counselor, therapist, or trusted mentor can provide personalized guidance that goes beyond what a general article can offer. The goal here is to help you start the conversation with yourself — not to replace professional support if you need it.
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